Journeys In Crunk Sponsored By Burn Baby Burn, The Official Hot Sauce of The Black Panthers
B-List rappers are the best! They don't care how they look at club dates. Now having that said, I would just like to go on the record to say that Trick Daddy and Pastor Troy look extremely dusty in person. I'm glad I didn't pay to get in and party with these "celebrities." Anyways, as 'Bad Bitch' blasted over the speakers the dj announced that the baddest bitch of Florida was due to make an appearance in about an hour for a special performance. Trina has always referred to herself as the baddest bitch so of course everyone, myself included, thought she would be the bitch in question to show up. My friend (read: associate who helped with gas money) grabbed my arm and screamed "Trina gawn be hea' chile!"
About 45 minutes later the dj announced that the "number one hot girl in the United States" was in the building and the crowd went crazy. Some silly nego screamed at the top of his lungs "I can't wait to see that bitch ass in person my nigga!" Someone should've shot his ass for making that statement. He then directed us to give our attention to the center stage as the curtains raised.
It was Khia.
Every single stab wound, bullet hole, and cigarette burn that I saw on the video for "My Neck, My Back" was visible. To make matters worse she had on some see-through number that showed her droopy breastsess. As she performed on stage her boobs circled around like the spin cycle on a washing machine. Eww! About three songs later she told the crowd she loved us and to have a safe night and made her way off of stage. I was on the side of the stage platform so she had to walk past me. As she passed me, she informed me I had on some "bad ass muthafuckin' Baby Phat air-rangz." I smiled and said thanks and she continued walking. My friend then nudge my arm and told me I was rude. Rude? I said thank you to the bitch so I was confused. My friend then told me I was looking directly at Khia's teeth while she was talking to me. Oh well. Yesterday someone emailed this picture of Khia to me and it almost crashed my computer. I think this may even be the same outfit she had on when she was performing the night I saw her. Hell to the nah!
Has anyone else had a brush with the b-side before? Lemme know in the comments.
Use don't abuse (ie. adding me to your site's mailing list). And for the love of God please stop sending mp3 files of your music. I am not Clive Davis and to be frank I probably don't want to hear the shit anyway. You should also know that I take my slow, precious time responding to email. And sometimes I don't respond at all. Fresh.email@example.com
LEAVE SOME $$$ ON THE NIGHT STAND
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