Congratulations Beyonce, you're having the worst week ever.

To coincide with my previous post about being jobless, I wanted to continue on with bad news. We all need a lil depression sprinkled in our lives every now and then :) At least it's not related to myself. It's all about Ms. Knowles.

Pink Panther Delayed to 2006 Yeah, like we're all going to lose sleep over this.

Beyonce Ordered To Pay $1 Million This is chump change, Jigga probably spends the same amount of money a year on chapstick alone.

It's about to be a what?! [/lame song] B and Paris both want to grace the cover of Vanity Fair. I personally think that Paris' dead-eyed ass should be the covergirl for the simple fact that Pink Panther is going to be pushed back another year. Plus maybe the article will include some more pictures of her nipples slipping out of her tank top. Yanno the white boys would love it.

Poor Beyonce, this just isn't your week. First the media puts you on blast for your love for curry chicken and now all of this. It's all good, just spray on some True Star and keep it moving. Just don't forget that you are having the worst week ever.

Speaking on the lines of fragrances, would you like to smell like you're cumming today?

Etc, etc . . .

Buy Posh Spice's new jeans. It'll do wonders for your ass (yeah, like it did hers? please).

"I've got no bum at all. People tell me my jeans are like a Wonderbra for their
bum. But I have to take their word for it because I've got nothing back
"I have to stick it out and pretend. Trust me, I look awful naked,"
she claimed.

The Best Post Ever National Alert: MWW ! (Missing White Woman) This is by far the most thought provoking piece I've viewed today.

White Girls Say The Darnest Things! In the July issue of Elle magazine, Lindsay is quoted as saying, "Black guys love me- Damon (Dash), P. Diddy. 50 cent called my agent for my number. He said he was watching Mean Girls and loved it. I was freaking out! The first thing I thought was, Where's Eminem? I'm in love with him!"

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Use don't abuse (ie. adding me to your site's mailing list). And for the love of God please stop sending mp3 files of your music. I am not Clive Davis and to be frank I probably don't want to hear the shit anyway. You should also know that I take my slow, precious time responding to email. And sometimes I don't respond at all. Fresh.crunkjuice@gmail.com



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