1.02.2006

Flava of Love Recap



Ladies and gentlemen, cooning on network television has a brand new face and it ain't pretty. Last night I had the glorious opportunity to watch the premiere episode of The Flavor of Love and it was everything I could dream for. I bet the white execs at VH-1 were all sitting around at a meeting one day eating fig newtons wondering how they could possibly re-create the mad niggerish success that was (and hopefully still will be) Being Bobby Brown but only with a competitive, catty twist, a la America's Next Top Model.

Whatever the case, Lord knows that it worked on me. 20 women from all over the country are attempting to get a chance to savor the flavor of love. Only 15 ladies were left standing with clocks around their neck, but not before Flava Flav could leave them with nicknames like "Cherry", "Apple", "Peaches", "Serious", "Oyster", "Georgia" and "Hoopz". Now at first I thought this nigga was making a fruit salad but the nicknames actually helped me out in remembering their names. Smart move Flav.

One thing I can respect about the show was the quality of women. At least Flav is realistic in his goal for the punanni which is a hell of a lot more than I can say about some (c)rappers. Females getting feisty over an ugly ass nigga, wow, I'm in high school again. Stretch marks, busted grills, and bad weaves were in more abundance than the whole hour of UnCut. Yes!

I wonder what Chuck D thinks of all this?

Heard Em Say

He's not only "the original king of R&B" (just ask his wife if you want to debate) and probably the only person that likes to breakdance to the sound of Christmas carolers singing, he also loves the place he migrated to: the ATL. In true B-Brown fashion, though, Bobby says he thanks himself for the city being so large in status. "The hottest thing about Atlanta is me, my brother Tommy and [Jermaine Dupri]," Brown determined. "I was the one who made Atlanta hot, but now it's time for me to move on and make another place hot." (mtv)





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