Paula Abdul broke her nose over the weekend after she fell while trying to avoid stepping on her chihuahua, Tulip. Ha ha!

Abdul told ExtraTV that she tore cartilage in her nose and fractured her toe. "I took a nasty fall ... trying not to hurt my dog. I bruised myself on my arm ... my chest, my waist all the way down to my hip. All from my little chubby Tulip."

Whatever Paula. I trip over my imaginary rottweiler King after a couple of rounds of Grey Goose and cranberry juice every Saturday and I have managed not to break one single bone. What you been drinking on? Straight up now tell me the truth!

This is all Arsenio Hall's fault. We gotta falsely accuse a black man at least once a month, right? I'm just trying to meet my quota.

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